That is the question I have been asking myself for the past year or more. Yes, more than a year has gone by since I first considered it. No one at our Parish veils. It was custom for a long time in most Churches, but DEFINITELY in the Catholic Church. You did not go into Mass without your head covered. And then it changed...
And now, and apparently for some time, women are going back to it. I found this Blog --
The Careless Catholic, who talks Jennifer Fulwiler, who wrote this fantastic Article in September 2011 called
In Praise of Imperfect Reverence. It is probably the most like what I feel - not holy enough, excuse, excuse... Ok, I have to state, I have not seen any other moms dressed the way she describes at Mass. But I do know that like these two women, and countless others, I have talked myself out of this for a year. It is time for action!
Kelly, at The Careless Catholic, really describes me in her blog post (thank you Kelly). I totally could have written most of it. In fact.... (clearly I crossed out parts that did not pertain and added my own words. Thank you Kelly - I love that you wrote it first and hope you don't mind me changing your words to suit me while giving you total credit for being way braver and openly telling you I want to be you when I grow up).
"I've been meaning to write on this topic for some time now. Especially after the response that this give-away garnered almost a year ago. Thank you again, Fr. Z! But it was only after reading this article by Jennifer Fulwiler at NCRegister.com today that I was finally inclined to share my thoughts on why and how this Sunday, I am wearing came to wear a head covering at Mass.
Like Mrs. Fulwiler, I was hung up about being seen as holier-than-thou if I wore a chapel veil. And I, too, had this longing in my heart for a long time to wear one. I had read much on veil wearing in booklets, blog posts and articles. Through that reading, prayer and supportive discussions with my husband my desire grew. I wanted a very personal way that I could show my love, respect and belief in Our Lord truly present in the Holy Eucharist. A gift to Him and a reminder to myself. In the simplest terms it is for me an outward act of Faith, Hope, and Love. I have been wearing a chapel veil to Mass and Adoration now for the past two years. I started wearing one after the day I realized just realized that, for me personally, it would will be an act of humility. Because everything in me wants to blend in and not stand out. I don't want people to judge me or not like me. Unfortunately, I focus too much on people pleasing. This fear of mine is/was rooted in pride. I had to force myself to just wear it to Mass one time. Sure, I got some looks the first few times, but that's because I'm the only one at my parish wearing one. People will naturally look at something that is new or different. Now, I get nothing. No looks or comments. It turned out to be no big deal after all. Just like most things in life that we like to stress about.
I also have to point out that my fear wasn't just the thought of others judging me as little-miss-piety, but that they would think that I was somehow judging them. I didn't want other women thinking that I was somehow saying (by my wearing a veil) that they weren't holy without one. It's laughable really, that any woman would think that just because they cover their heads that they are somehow better or closer to God than other women. It's also laughable that anyone would assume that just because a woman would cover her head that she would somehow think less of those that don't. The whole thing is ridiculous really. What we women do to ourselves and to one another. Over-thinking everything. Will we be judged? Will they feel judged?....it's endless, isn't it?
I'm not sure what gave me the courage to finally just wear one, but I'm glad I did. I don't regret my decision in the least. I am a little anxious about it, but I know I will I feel peace. And that is enough for me to know that I made the right decision."
All of that was Kelly's post. Do you see yourself? If so, I've got more for you...
Many women talked to me about it. Some feel strongly that once they took their veils off they won't ever put them back on. One or two were adamant about wearing them, and when those types approach, they just turn everyone off. But most felt called to Veil in reverence to The Real Presence of Christ. I mean - it's Biblical (see below). They love it. They say it helps them focus in Mass. But in the back of my mind, I felt conflicted.... what will people think? I even say to other women, "I just don't feel comfortable. It's not for me!" I ask our Priest. He says, "there are other ways you can humble yourself". I feel relieved, but at the same time, God is calling me saying "dear one, wear the veil. It's not about you. It's not about women who put you off or women who like it or not. I am telling you to wear it!" And still, I don't buy one. That's my last excuse. I can't wear it because I don't have one.
Plus, " The Catholic Church has decided to no longer enforce this Biblical custom through Canon Law, and in doing so, the Church is saying it does not want to be our nanny. The chapel veil is a custom for women to do voluntarily, because they want to, not because they are being forced to. The idea is that women are to read what the Scriptures have to say, and be convicted according to what is contained therein. In order for a chapel veil to be an authentic sign of humility and holiness, it must be voluntary. Indeed, Christian women are supposed to wear one, but it is never to be forced." I read that on the Catholic Knights site. So I'm in the clear right? Um - no... read on!
And then, this past weekend, God called my bluff by way of my friend E and her daughters. We were talking about our beloved Faith as we always do (because really it's how we live our lives, not because we are so special, but because Catholic is who we are and there is a lot to talk about). So anyway - we were talking and she sent her daughter out to get a veil from the car and put it on my head. It's Navy - my color. It is beautiful (it is above). Whoops, there goes the excuse about not having one. Hmmm...
Any time we are called to change our ways, to do what the Lord wants us to do, we question it! WHY!?! Simple answer, because we are human.
*sigh*
Let me help you if you are thinking of it. I'm going to give you a few links... great info. But first, let me show you the Biblical back up (thank you Caroline). The Bible says women should cover their heads. It's pretty clear. Am I saying you have to? NO. Am I saying you ought to? Yes, I am. I think I am! But really I am just passing on the evidence I've found. It is a personal thing, but I believe it to be right (even though I have resisted it and totally understand that).
Biblically:
1 Corinthians 11:2-16
New Revised Standard Version, Anglicised Catholic Edition (NRSVACE)
Head Coverings
2 I commend you because you remember me in everything and maintain the traditions just as I handed them on to you. 3 But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the husband is the head of his wife, and God is the head of Christ. 4 Any man who prays or prophesies with something on his head disgraces his head, 5 but any woman who prays or prophesies with her head unveiled disgraces her head—it is one and the same thing as having her head shaved. 6 For if a woman will not veil herself, then she should cut off her hair; but if it is disgraceful for a woman to have her hair cut off or to be shaved, she should wear a veil. 7 For a man ought not to have his head veiled, since he is the image and reflection of God; but woman is the reflection of man. 8 Indeed, man was not made from woman, but woman from man. 9 Neither was man created for the sake of woman, but woman for the sake of man. 10 For this reason a woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels. 11 Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man or man independent of woman. 12 For just as woman came from man, so man comes through woman; but all things come from God. 13 Judge for yourselves: is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head unveiled? 14 Does not nature itself teach you that if a man wears long hair, it is degrading to him, 15 but if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For her hair is given to her for a covering. 16 But if anyone is disposed to be contentious—we have no such custom, nor do the churches of God.
For more than 2000+ years women have covered their heads in Mass (and many other Churches as well). THIS POST (from Fisheaters) says "It was written into the 1917 Code of Canon Law, Canon 1262, that women must cover their heads -- "especially when they approach the holy table" ("mulieres autem, capite cooperto et modeste vestitae, maxime cum ad mensam Dominicam accedunt") ... THIS ONE (from a Catholic Life) too. And then Vatican II happened, and because it wasn't addressed, people assumed it was stricken from Canon Law but it wasn't.
Did you get all that? It is Canon Law that we Veil. So what is the problem? Are we really arrogant enough to think the Church had it wrong for 2000+ years? I don't think so! During the big feminist movement in the U.S., women burned their veils, and insisted on being Priests (or so I've read). Can you imagine? No one wanted to rock the boat so the U.S. Catholic Churches didn't push the issue. I want to address this and I will get some flack and I'm ok with it.
There is nothing more feminine than knowing when to submit (you're welcome Gabby Reece) and be humble.(Our husbands submit to us too, but we don't openly wipe their help and submission in their faces publicly.) We are feminine for our husbands, we cover ourselves in public, we run our domestic churches and we do it with little complaining (ok, maybe a lot of complaining) but we do it because we are called to. Well, I've got news for you sisters, God says we must submit to him, we must cover our heads. It's been that way since Biblical times. Who are we to even question it?
Wait, what did I just say?! Pause. Oh yeah, that is what this little adventure of mine has been about. HOW embarrassing for me. I am sorry Lord! Please forgive me! And while I am here, if I am being honest, it appears I may have to address longer skirts and no pants at Mass as well (I do not typically wear pants to Mass, but not ever might be coming).
The bottom line is, through my research I have found the following to be true:
"The Bible is very clear about this. Women are supposed to veil in the presence of the Eucharist and in prayer, but at the same time, they are to take it upon themselves to do it. They are not to be forced into it by men, nor coerced into it by the Canon Law of the Church. Coercion actually defeats the whole purpose of veiling. (Which may be one reason why the custom of the veil has no place in canon law.) It has to be voluntary, if it is truly to be a sign of holiness and humility. This is why the Church removed it from Canon Law. It was not to send a signal to women that they need not do it anymore. Rather, it was to tell women that when they veil themselves, it is not because men told them to. It is a sign and symbol coming from them, voluntarily, not as a grudging requirement against their will." (from the Catholic Knight Article called
The Chapel Veil - Veiling or Headcovering Fully Explained ) and now I have to act on it. I submit to you that I'd be way braver if you would all get there quickly and wear a veil with me.
One more quote from the Fisheater's site mentioned above...
"This one superficially small act is:
- so rich with symbolism: of submission to authority; of surrender to God; of the imitation of Our Lady as a woman who uttered her "fiat!"; of covering our glory for His glory; of modesty; of chastity, of our being vessels of life like the Chalice, the Ciborium and, most especially, Our Lady;
- an Apostolic ordinance -- with roots deep in the Old Testament -- and, therefore, a matter of intrinsic Tradition;
- the way Catholic women have worshipped for two millennia (i.e., even if it weren't a matter of Sacred Tradition in the intrinsic sense, it is, at the least, a matter of ecclesiastical tradition, which also must be upheld). It is our heritage, a part of Catholic culture;
- pragmatic: it leaves one free to worry less about "bad hair days";
- and for the rebels out there, it is counter-cultural nowadays, you must admit!
The question I'd like answered is, "Why would any Catholic woman not want to veil herself?" "
The Catholic Knight has MANY blog posts about Veiling. I'll list a few:
Catholic Planet has some great info too. This page made me feel closest to the women of Jesus' life. His Mother, our beloved Mary, and the holy/humble women of that day wore veils. How wonderful to have that in common with them. How blessed and special.
Since the Doctrine of the Real Presence is mentioned above, and I wanted to make sure you had really good information on this subject. In short, Catholics believe that the body and blood of Jesus is present in the Eucharistic Table. Please refer to a fantastic site called
The Real Presence which is chock full of fantastic information on Transubstantiation and the validity of the Real Presence.
"The simplest way to express what Christ asks us to believe about the Real Presence is that the Eucharist is really He. The Real Presence is the real Jesus. We are to believe that the Eucharist began in the womb of the Virgin Mary; that the flesh which the Son of God received from His Mother at the Incarnation is the same flesh into which He changed bread at the Last Supper; that the blood He received from His Mother is the same blood into which He changed wine at the Last Supper. Had she not given Him His flesh and blood there could not be a Eucharist.
We are to believe that the Eucharist is Jesus Christ - simply, without qualification. It is God become man in the fullness of His divine nature, in the fullness of His human nature, in the fullness of His body and soul, in the fullness of everything that makes Jesus Jesus. He is in the Eucharist with His human mind and will united with the Divinity, with His hands and feet, His face and features, with His eyes and lips and ears and nostrils, with His affections and emotions and, with emphasis, with His living, pulsating, physical Sacred Heart. That is what our Catholic Faith demands of us that we believe. If we believe this, we are Catholic. If we do not, we are not, no matter what people may think we are.
Father John A. Hardon S.J."
I am not a Theology Major, but yes, that is what I believe, as do/should all Catholics.
If you made it this far, thank you! If you are upset with me... I understand how you feel. I've been upset with others who stated these things with me, it's part of the process, sister. I do understand.
And now I'll be working on my courage and insistence with myself on this. For I am not going to allow my fear to hold me back from My relationship with Christ.
Please feel free to hold me accountable as well. And please, pray for me!
Hugs, Love & Blessings...
Emily
